I have wanted and found it allusive
The endless forms of desire
I have burned on the coals
The stories of old
Among them lay my peace in the fires.
The soul in the mind
Is a gem covered in a worldly shine
Not my truth but in its proof
There I lay resting under a roof
How grim is the sin
As I strived for every win
That my dreams once obtained
Meant little more than an old hymn.
Dear Lord,
To me be gracious
I am in distress
I have what I wanted
I’ve lost hard and I’m haunted
The anxiety mounts
I’m not quite what I flaunted.
Court side to life
Because in my soul I’ve been stunted.
Life seems to be about things
We grow and then we die
We obtain and it’s a lie
Us as the collective unsatisfied
Never turned to what’s inside
Because the outside is so distractible
Building, jobs and mountains
In them walk the visibly attractable
The soul speaks out
Yet it is retracted
Tries to set boundaries
But leaves language so reactive
How do I get to peace, she asks
When I’m afraid of simple
I reach and think and plan and plug in
And the internet appears invincible
Feeling small among them all
Though I lavish in worldly riches
How I know it is sanctuary I long for in spirit
As I smoother my family in kisses
Love, Humble me, oh lord
To divinity that seeks to sustain
Chasten me from the worldly pit
And remember me by my inner name.
~ B
